Week 14: On Camera


By Dawn

Reckoning week has rolled around again: It's time to gather for yet another photo shoot and do our official monthly weigh-ins. I cant help but wonder why, at a time when Im feeling the most vulnerable about how I look, Im finding myself thrust more and more in front of cameras and people. I dont consider it to be serendipity.

Its nice to connect with Julie and Sarah on the shoot. They both look great and Im wondering if I look just as good to them. We talk about our challenges and struggles, and its comforting to learn that Im not alone in working through this process of thinking differently about exercise and nutrition.

Either weve become anesthetized to being photographed in skimpy clothing or weve just become pros at it. Either way, the shoot moves quickly and were out of the studio in record time.

The weigh-in and chat with Marissa (the nutritionist) later in the week is actually pleasant. I dont feel any trepidation because I know Ive been working hard to stay on track and do better with what and how I eat. I still struggle with fitting in breakfast, particularly on the weekends (when Im not held to a strict regimen of deadlines like I am when Im at work), and Marissa and I discuss how important it is that I get a handle on this lapse, since it's hurting my metabolism … which already moves at the rate of a turtle.

My weigh-in shows that I've lost some more weight—not as much as Id like, but Ill take it! We also discuss ways to manage stress, which is also hampering my weight loss. It makes perfect sense to me that keeping a frenetic pace and not getting enough sleep would keep my body in a state that is counterproductive to living a truly healthy lifestyle. I realize that Ive got to make some changes in my life if Im going to win the battle of the bulge.

Ironically, the thought of having to do so stresses me out. But somethings gotta give.