Making Friends Online With Women Who Are Trying to Get Pregnant


Are you TTC (trying to conceive) with your DH (dear husband), but your DD (dear daughter) keeps interrupting your BD (baby dance, i.e., sex)? Welcome to the world of online reproductive acronyms.

During the nerve-racking, heartbreaking process of waiting for positive results from my HPTs (home pregnancy tests), I found some of my best buddies online. While it's not cool to natter about your cycle to passersby in real life (IRL), you can find loads of women online who are also up at 3 a.m. wondering if their EWCM (egg white cervical mucus) means it's time to do the BD, or if their CD (cycle day) is off, regardless of what it says in TCOYF (Taking Charge of Your Fertility).

No, my husband would not like me to refer to sex as the "baby dance" or know every phantom symptom I experience in the DPO (days past ovulation), but when I'm chatting with my comrades in stirrups and friends in fertility, there is no such thing as TMI (too much information).

The greatest specter dreaded by the online TTC community is the arrival of AF (Aunt Flo)—the sign of a failed cycle. Your TTC friend may report a BFN (big fat negative) on an HPT, but the writing isn't on the wall until dumb old AF shows up.

When she rears her ugly head, I'm off to the computer for sympathetic responses—::hugs::—and encouragement.

There are some great guides to all known TTC acronyms posted at and, so you can get online and send FTTA (fertile thoughts to all) or find a CB (cycle buddy).

I've found my best TTC friends by blogging about my own experiences trying to get PG (pregnant). They started washing up on the shores of my personal blog, and I started reading theirs. And before long, we had a circle of people battling various kinds of IF (infertility), weathering miscarriages, and coming up with solutions together—from in vitro fertilization (IVF) to adoption.

Next Page: The three big PG/IF blogs I read

[ pagebreak ]My top three PG/IF blogs
Stirrup Queens. Melissa's site is arguably the greatest warehouse of TTC camaraderie and IF information. She is raising twins while making sure that every last woman in the world has all of the information she needs about every topic from natural miscarriage to choosing an egg donor. She is a tour de force of information and emotion, and was a real lifesaver for me after my miscarriages.

A Little Pregnant. Now that the online TTC community knows her story has a happy ending (she just gave birth to her second son), it's a little easier to read Julie's account of five IVF cycles, two intrauterine insemination (IUI) cycles, a premature baby, HELLP syndrome, and a pregnancy achieved through donor eggs. The miraculous part—aside from her two sons—is Julie's enduring sense of humor throughout her ordeals.

Julia {Here Be Hippogriffs}. If Julie is the patron saint of infertility, Julia is the same for miscarriage. She has had thirteen pregnancies and three children (her twins were born last December), and she doesn't mind sharing every difficult detail in a very funny way.

There are also forums populated with TTC moms where you can post questions, seek comfort, or just LOL about someone's BD interrupted by her DD.

When I was pregnant with my first daughter, I joined a Birth Club on BabyCenter. They also have an Actively Trying forum with plenty of HPT action.

The purveyors of Mothering Magazine also have a forum where you can find many experienced TTCers hanging around and sharing helpful tips.

BBFN, TTCers. I'm off to check my OPK!