Jenny Mollen is an actress, best-selling author, and mom to 4-year-old Sid and almost-7-month-old Lazlo. In the years since becoming “Mom,” she’s learned a lot about everything from male anatomy to finding time for sex (or a pedicure). If you follow her on Instagram or Twitter, you’ve probably laughed at or shared her hilarious musings about parenthood and married life with actor Jason Biggs.
Now, after noticing some post-pregnancy pee problems, she's partnering with Stayfree. “I would inexplicably pee myself sometimes," Mollen tells Health. "Just a tiny bit, when I’m jumping on the trampoline. When the trampoline finds you, look it in the eye, don’t be afraid, reach into your bag, and take out a Stayfree Ultra-Thin All-In-One pad, and you will be fine. You can run, you can jump, you can do back flips–whatever you want.”
Here, Mollen holds nothing back about the ups and down of parenthood, her thyroid condition, and how she always “goes for the joke.”
On breastfeeding in public
“Once you get to probably week two of having a baby and having to feed the baby through your boob, it becomes more theirs than yours, and you just stop caring about [being in public]. You're like, 'Okay, who cares?' I wish I could just take them off my body, strap ‘em on my husband, and go to bed. But unfortunately, it doesn't work [like that].”
On discovering her hyperthyroidism
“I was like 'Maybe this is what happens' because I couldn't breastfeed as long [as I did with Sid]. I thought, 'Wow, I guess you just lose weight super fast.' And then I got down so low that there had to be something wrong. I got it checked out and now I'm dealing with it. I didn't want anybody to think I was anorexic. I just wanted to be honest about what was happening.”
On raising boys
“I didn't realize that between the penis and the testicles, there’s nothing there. It’s just skin. Like, I went to wipe my son and my husband said to me, “Jenny what did you think was there?! Another asshole?’ There’s nothing there, guys, just so you know.”
On what she didn’t expect to enjoy about parenting
“How great it feels to not be with your kids. I thought when I was a parent that I would just want to be with my kids 24/7, but now, I could be in the subway and it feels like I’m in Hawaii."
On the worst part of the day
“[I didn't realize] how hard it is to put a child to bed. I just sort of thought you put them in their room and that was it. It turns out it’s a two-hour ritual. Nightly.”
On having sex post-pregnancy
“Maybe it's just we've been married for so long and you know you can have it whenever, it's not as exciting. Like maybe if there were this evil force trying to keep us apart, I'd wanna sleep with him all the time. But because I could do it whenever, it loses the excitement."
On how she and her husband stay connected
“I think that we always go for the joke. We don't keep it serious for very long. We can talk seriously about some things, like my thyroid thing. I was like, 'Jason, thank you for being here for me, but I really do wish this was happening to you instead of me.' So there's always a way to infuse it with my own sadistic spin on things.”
On her (evolving) self-care routine
“I'm going to start acupuncture, so I'm planning on being more vigilant about those kind of things. I definitely make sure that I take time for myself and I'm not just always doing whatever Sid tells me to do, even though most of the time I do. Sometimes I do make sure that I can have a date night with my husband or get a pedicure. Even though I get maybe two pedicures every six months because of my kids.”